Perfectionism
Perfectionism is more than simply having high standards. It can leave you feeling as though nothing you do is ever quite good enough, no matter how much effort you put in. You may spend significant time trying to avoid mistakes, meet expectations, or prove your worth through achievement.
While perfectionism can sometimes appear to lead to success, it often comes at the cost of increased stress, anxiety, self-criticism, and difficulty enjoying the things you accomplish.
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Perfectionism can look different for everyone. You may notice:
Setting unrealistically high standards for yourself
Being highly self-critical when you make mistakes
Feeling that your best is never good enough
Procrastinating because you fear getting something wrong
Spending excessive time trying to get things "just right"
Struggling to delegate or trust others to complete tasks
Avoiding new opportunities for fear of failing
Seeking reassurance or external validation
Finding it difficult to celebrate your achievements
Basing your self-worth on productivity, success, or performance
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Perfectionism often develops as a way of protecting ourselves from criticism, rejection, failure, or feelings of not being good enough.
For some people, striving to achieve, perform, or avoid mistakes became a way of gaining approval, creating a sense of safety, or feeling valued. Over time, these patterns can become exhausting, leaving you constantly chasing a standard that always seems just out of reach.
Understanding what perfectionism has been trying to protect you from can be an important step towards changing your relationship with it.
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Therapy can help you understand the beliefs and patterns that keep perfectionism going.
Our psychologists can support you to reduce self-criticism, develop greater flexibility, build self-worth beyond achievement, and learn to approach mistakes and uncertainty with greater compassion and confidence.
Taking the next step
Living with perfectionism can feel like being stuck in a constant cycle of pressure, achievement, and never quite feeling satisfied.
Our psychologists can help you understand where these patterns developed and work towards a life that feels less driven by fear of failure and more connected to your values and wellbeing.